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Healthy Boundaries

8/25/2020

This morning I came across old notes I'd taken regarding boundaries. "A boundary is a place where my responsibility ends and another persons begins". My boundaries are often slack in both directions. I would like to learn to automatically:

respect other peoples boundaries
say "no" without guilt
accept when other people say "no"
know what I want and what I need and ask for it
take care of myself
say "here's what I can do......." when I am feeling resentful our put out by a request
recognize my values and not compromise them
feel safe having disagreements
feel safe expressing difficult emotions
not feel responsible for someone else's happiness or reaction
know and honor who I am.

Hey God, Hey John....

8/24/2020

Me: Hey God.
God: Hello.
Me: I'm falling apart. Can you put me back together?
God: I would rather not.
Me: Why?
God: Because you aren't a puzzle.
Me: What about all of the pieces of my life that are falling down onto the ground?
God: Let them stay there for a while. They fell off for a reason. Take some time and decide if you need any of those pieces back.
Me: You don't understand! I'm breaking down!
God: No - you don't understand. You are breaking through. What you are feeling are just growing pains. You are shedding the things and the people in your life that are holding you back. You aren't falling apart. You are falling into place. Relax. Take some deep breaths and allow those things you don't need anymore to fall off of you. Quit holding onto the pieces that don't fit you anymore. Let them fall off. Let them go.
Me: Once I start doing that, what will be left of me?
God: Only the very best pieces of you.
Me: I'm scared of changing.
God: I keep telling you - YOU AREN'T CHANGING!! YOU ARE BECOMING!
Me: Becoming who?
God: Becoming who I created you to be! A person of light and love and charity and hope and courage and joy and mercy and grace and compassion. I made you for more than the shallow pieces you have decided to adorn yourself with that you cling to with such greed and fear. Let those things fall off of you. I love you! Don't change! ... Become! Become! Become who I made you to be. I'm going to keep telling you this until you remember it.
Me: There goes another piece.
God: Yep. Let it be.
Me: So ... I'm not broken?
God: Of course not! - but you are breaking like the dawn. It's a new day.
Become!!!
Author: John Roedel

Ask, Dream, Stay connected

8/22/2020

No One is Better than you

7/29/2020

Imagine if we were all taught at a young age that "no one is better than you are - and you are no better than anyone else". Wow - such a statement (coming from someone who believes them) could teach both self worth and humility in one simple sentence.

Color Wheel

7/27/2020

Wouldn't it be great if they taught the color wheel in school: inner ring in kinder-garden, middle ring in middle school and outer ring in high school. If we could all name our feelings, it would be so much easier to understand our emotions and respond rather than react - feel rather than suppress.

Prayer to Source

7/26/2020

I am kind
I am considerate
I am loving
I am enough as I am.

Dear Source,
Thank you for this new day, it’s beauty and light.
Today I will try to leave yesterday behind to focus on today - this minute - here and now.
Today I will nurture the maturing woman within and only then will I reach out. I will remember to spend time caring for myself today.
Thank you for reminding me that I am loved and that I needed to experience everything in my past to get where I am going.
Thank you for teaching me that no one is better than me - and that I'm no better than anyone else. Also, that I am fundamentally good, fundamentally whole and worthy.
Today I am responsible for my efforts, not the outcome of my efforts. I will do the best I can with what I have.
Remind me often that I am an actor, not the director:
I need not carry the weight of the world on my shoulders because I don't control what happens.
When I am acting tough and strong - I am scared: remind me that it takes courage to be vulnerable and soft.
I trust my inner voice and know that only by following it will I be at peace. I will endeavor to stop being a human doing and rest.
My unrelenting standards are hurting me and those I love, and there is no such thing as perfection. Please remind me often to live in the gray - to go easier - and to be of service where I can.
Remind me often to laugh at myself and not take myself too seriously.
Thank you for reminding me how fortunate I am to have a fully functioning body and fully functioning organs.
I accept that some things will get worse before they get better.
Remind me to sit with my negative feelings and experience them: stuffing them until there is no room left inside is so much worse worse.
”What am I feeling?" "Is there a story I am telling myself that is creating these feelings or making it worse?"
May those I love be happy, safe, healthy and at peace.
May I be safe, healthy, at peace and unafraid to be happy.

What's inside?

7/25/2020

Imagine you are holding a cup of coffee and then someone bumps into you and you spill your coffee everywhere. Why did you spill the coffee?
"Because someone bumped into me!"
Wrong answer. You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup. Had there been tea in the cup, you would have spilled tea. Whatever is inside the cup is what will spill out.
So, when life comes along and shakes you (which WILL happen), whatever is inside you will come out.
We have to ask ourselves “what's in my cup?" When life gets tough, what spills over?
Joy, gratefulness, peace and humility? Anger, bitterness, harsh words and reactions?"
Life provides the cup, you choose what's in it.
Today let's work towards filling our cups with gratitude, forgiveness, joy, words of affirmation and kindness, gentleness and love for others.
(found on Facebook - to my knowledge, posted anonymously)

Have more fun

7/25/2020

Chill out - Be Easier - Have more fun
When you are working so hard to find your path – you are putting up resistance to finding it.
If you think “I should be doing something different” say to yourself: “I’m doing fine – I’m on my path – everything is coming to me. Everything is unfolding just as it should be for me.”

Abraham/Esther Hicks

Baby Fawn

7/24/2020

Click to see the video of a baby fawn we rescued!. She stayed overnight with us and we took her to a sanctuary in the morning!

Click to see video

Reminders

7/24/2020

I want to remind myself often that I am human, that I make mistakes - and that's okay. This list will continue to grow as I add things I want to keep handy for review.

It's important to be vulnerable
to live in my truth
to show up as I am
and own my story.

When hurt, its easy to use the vulnerability of people I love against them.

If I behave out of line, admit it quickly and emphatically.

To experience joy I need to practice:
gratitude
empathy
trust
inclusivity
diversity
equity
tolerance and more

Remember to ask only for what I need and offer what I can.

Is my stuff a scab or a scar? If it's a scab - I need to work on it to allow it to heal. Don't let the scabs pile up.

Self Care involves
doing a joyful thing just for the hell of it!
Have I been taking time daily for self care?

Mindfulness is active attention to the present,
observing thoughts and feelings without judgement. Am I living in the moment?

When someone triggers me emotionally, ride the wave!
Sit quietly.
What am I feeling? Come back to the present!
What's the story I'm telling yourself?

Tumbled and tossed and beautiful